Thinking 101

While waiting in line at the bank drive through the other day, this is what I saw:

They were sea gulls, pecking at a surface-looking for food?

But, this is the surface:

Yes, the stone roof of the bank drive through. This bank is near a partially frozen creek-not a sea for sure. The temp was about 20degrees. And they were pecking like crazy up there. Were they really hungry, or just "thinking outside the box" for a feeding solution?

I wonder if sometimes I am so rigid that I can not "think outside the box", and am possibly missing out on a different way of looking at things or doing a task?

I am filled with the phrases: "This is the way it should be", "This is what I should be doing", "This is what they should be doing", "This or that is wrong".

I was speaking with a close SFriend the other day about how all the time I am on the computer, and doing my blog, I am really loving it, but I am always letting the "Should bees" nag and sting me. This war in the brain begins-you don't always have to be doing what you need to do, sometimes you should do what you want to do, NO, NO, you should vacuum now, you should organize this or that now, you should be, you should be. Yikes, what a racket up there. And then this war in the grey matter continues the fight at night when I am supposed to be sleeping-do this first the next day, then that, and if that happens, do this, and then, and then. I wish for a button-press it and I go to sleep. It has a timer for seven hours, and poof, I would be awake, reading my paper and drinking my coffee.

I wonder sometimes why I am so hardwired to always be thinking and planning, I even count while going up and down stairs, and while waiting for something to happen-like the computer to go to a site, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and then 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Or a light to change or a timer to go off. I am never happy to sit through an entire show without thinking, when will this end? What do I have to do next that I wish this over? I love opera, and that was always one of my favorite things to do, but when we used to go to Opera performances, I was so anxious to go there, then once it started very rarely was I so taken away in the moment that I wasn't wondering when it would be over.

Why am I in such a hurry to "move-on" to the next thing?

Why do I always have to be planning something?

Maybe I think outside the box too much? Is that possible? Do I always have to improve on something or a way of doing things.

Why am I so in need of thinking?

Got me, but if I figure it out, you will be the first to know.

Now, about the next blog that I have been thinking about.....